Something Odd Comes This Way

SPOILER ALERT – Stop reading now if you’re squeamish about discussing womens’ sanitary products or suffer from acute sensitivity to words such as pads, tampons, panty liners, menstruation, cramps, bleeding, monthly curse, surfing the red tide or anything whatsoever to do with normal functions of the human, female body.

If so please click here to return to previous blog.

I’ve always been intrigued by who decided to come up with the idea of putting “Odd Spots” on the sticky strips on women’s sanitary napkins?  Libra!  (Not that I’m naming names)

I mean sure these little tidbits are interesting, some amusing, but 1) who came up with odd spots in the first place and  2) who decided to print them on these strips and wouldn’t I have loved to have been a fly on the wall at that pitch meeting.

For those of you who don’t know what I mean by Odd Spots…

·                    Gynophobia is the fear of women

·                    Androphobia is the fear of men

·                    The average bed is home to over 6 billion dust mites

·                    The sound a camel makes is called nuzzling

·                    The average lifespan of a taste bus is 7-10 days

·                    The average speed of an avalance is 35K an hour

·                    One brow wrinkle is the result of 200,000 frowns

Just to name a few…

I personally love this stuff but really, on a sticky strip from a pad? 

Where did they think we would use this information?  Perhaps as a conversation starter?  Perfect.  ‘Cus of course I keep a wad of these rolled up in my purse for just this very occasion. 

Did you know a snail can sleep for three years?

What?

Where did I get that information from…?? 

My Ipad?

Ummm Ooookay.

The other use of course is when I am on Who Wants to Be a Millionare and Eddy McGuire asks me;

The sound a camel makes is

A) Splooging  B) Snarking  C) Waffling  D)  Nuzzling

Hmmm...

Lock in “D” Eddie!

$250, 000 later I will forever be in the debt of those wunderkind advertising geniuses and thanking God everyday that I was born a female with debilitating cramps, nausea, mood  swings, bloatedness and unbearable headaches yet was lucky to have discovered Libra Goodnights with wings when I did.

I’m not saying this is a bad thing,  just something I’ve always wondered about like; why is it if you drive a car or motorbike you need to have a license, but not if you ride a bicycle…and what really is the difference between Diet Coke, Coke Zero and Pepsi Max? 

If I’m lucky, the answers to these questions may be just a month away….